Editing Openai/67fdb3c1-a488-800b-8659-6e01e1418399 (section)

===== The Program (WDYDLW): =====

Every Monday at 0600 Galactic Eastern Time, federal employees across all agencies receive a mandatory "Performance Transparency Notification". The subject line?

: 🔍 “Hey [Your Name], We Noticed You Haven’t Reflected Yet 👀”

The email demands 5 bullet points explaining what you did last week. Failure to respond flags your profile with a "Yellow Dot" — the bureaucratic equivalent of a scarlet letter, visible on all internal communications, security badges, and cafeteria trays.

Employees began writing:
* “Attended 3.5 productivity calibration rituals.”
* “Filed Form ZETA-X in compliance with existential policy shift #88221b.”
* “Pretended to help a constituent for 9.3 minutes.”

Some just submitted:
* “I survived.”